Bang! Bang! -The First Fringe

In a Skype interview for the Rachael Ray Show scheduled to air this Wednesday, Michelle Obama jokingly revealed that her show-stopping fringe banged haircut that was all the rage before, during and after President Obama’s Inauguration for his second term in office, was inspired by a midlife crisis last month at the onset of her 49^th birthday…

…Okay, timeout, FLOTUS is 49?????  Clearly she needs to bottle and sell those Robinson genes ASAP!

Mrs. Obama also went on to say that she settled for the bangs because she wouldn’t be allowed to bungee jump or purchase a sports car (side-eyes my balding neighbor with the convertible who shops at Ed Hardy Online).

But seriously, if this is what I have to look forward to in the way of a midlife crisis, then bring on my 49^th birthday Jesus!

 

Election Eve 2012: Public Service Announcement to the Undecided Caucasian Electorate

At this, the eleventh hour just one day before the United States’ official election day;  if you find yourself a member of the still undecided Caucasian electorate population that has basically garnered all of the attention from both major presidential candidates this election season, perhaps this very rudimentary and candid endorsement from Chris Rock will help you to decide for whom to cast your ballot more expeditiously.

You’re Welcome.

Yeah…’Cuz Sorry is for Suckas!

So, in the latest episode of “I Can Do Better Than Obama,” starring the home-schooling, ovary inspecting Republican flavor of the week, presidential candidate Rick Santorum basically called out the POTUS for what he interpreted as being weak when The President apologized to the people of Afghanistan after it was revealed that American soldiers inadvertently burned materials belonging to prisoners at Bagram Air Base, including Qurans.

On NBC’s Meet The Press, Santorum clarified his remarks:

 “I don’t think the president should have apologized for something that was clearly inadvertent, [He should have said] this was inadvertent, this was a mistake. There was no deliberate act. There was no [intention of] disrespect – this is something that occurred that shouldn’t have occurred, but it was an accident.”

So, instead of simply stating “we apologize for accidentally burning your holy books,” Rick Santorum believes that the president should have articulated that sentiment 1) without actually using the words, “sorry” or “apologize” and instead replaced the short and sweet phrase or two with a varying amalgamation of the above 31 words.

Okay…wait.  So, admit to making a mistake, clarify that it was accidental, but by no means; NO WAY, NO HOW apologize for it. Right, because that makes sense.  Mr. Santorum went on to say that it was actually the Afghans that should be doing the apologizing.

 “The response… needs to be apologized for, by Karzai and the Afghan people, of attacking and killing our men and women in uniform, and overreacting to this mistake. That is the real crime, not what our soldiers did.”

 Okay, let try to put Rick’s theory into practice here…

You know what? I did mistakenly back into my neighbor’s car last week, but it wasn’t on purpose.  It was inadvertent – a misjudgment in night-time periphery.  It shouldn’t have occurred, but it was of course, just an accident.

I imagine that explanation will more than satisfy his claims adjuster.

But seriously though, someone cut off Santorum’s poppy supply please!  Westerners have played Occupy Afghanistan for the past several decades, have figuratively and literally pissed on their culture (and their dead) and now have burned their Qurans.  Mistake or not, how exactly did Santorum expect the Afghan people to respond? I’m pretty sure that we all believe in our heart of hearts that the matter of the burned Qurans was a horrible blunder on the part of the United States, but certainly one that was not deliberate.  I think however, at the very least, an apology for such an egregious error coming from the leader of the free world was not only a diplomatic gesture, but it was an opportunity to show that it isn’t global policing, ultimatums and sheer capitalism alone that makes our nation one of the greatest countries in the world, but the ability to display true contrition and humility, even in the face of an unintentional act that does.

Barry’s Best Week (In a Good Long While)

Coming off of a pretty resounding and  motivational State of The Union Address, The Obama Administration couldn’t have planned Tuesday any better, if they had hand-picked the joint sessions attendees themselves (or if they’d had the POTUS to end his speech with an encore rendition of Al’s Let’s Stay Together).

Like the rest of America, I’ve had my fill of talking points, bullet references and recycled stump speeches from both parties.  Last night, I was more interested in knowing where the President believed America really stood socially and economically, and what his plans were to resolve what has ailed us for so long.  And although he couldn’t have possibly given us an in-depth elucidation in the mere hour and change that he addressed the nation, I can say that I was satisfied with the fact that the President did address my big three.

National Security: Although not necessarily what I’d have opened with, right out of the gate, Barack Obama wanted to make sure that while some of America was pointing fingers and blaming him for any and everything, they were also reminded that Bin Laden had gotten “got” while on his watch…something the previous administration had only dreamed of doing (seeing as how they’d been playing a veritable game of Where’s Waldo with the man for the past ten years).  Prez also discussed the unacceptability of Iran constructing or acquiring nuclear weaponry and made clear his ardent stance (with or without peace negotiations or further sanctions) to ensure that Iran knew that although peace was always an option, America was not playing games with them and would respond swiftly and surely to their potential tomfoolery.

J-O-B-S: While the POTUS and his democratic supporters have been singing the same song for the last three years, Obama addressed the fact that like it or not, he had inherited the mess that had ultimately resulted in a not-so-fundamentally-strong economy and the loss of millions of jobs.  He also acknowledged that since in office, the economic rebound wasn’t as swift in coming as we all would have liked, but the Bailout out of companies like GM had in fact worked, resulting in more American jobs and the automaker reclaiming its throne as best in the business.  The President also expressed his willingness to work across party lines to get infrastructure jobs enacted, but challenged Congress to work to get a Bill on his desk that he could pass. Further, he suggested that incentives and tax relief be granted to American Companies that did not outsource American Jobs overseas.

Economic Equity:  Clearly the most divisive of political topics in the past few years (or ever), President Obama re-stressed his position that in order to stimulate the economy and provide opportunities that all Americans could benefit from, the nation’s majority (the 98 percent)who worked hard and did their fair share should be afforded some significant tax relief.  Becoming the poster child for this sentiment, Warren Buffet’s secretary (who notably makes substantially less money than her billionaire boss) was panned to many times during the speech, as Mr. Obama declared how senseless it was that those Americans who made significantly less money than their wealthy counterparts (the 2 percent), ultimately had to pay more in taxes.

Now, what I found so crucial about what the President discussed in The State of The Union Address last night was that so much of what he said could not have come at a better time.  For instance, yesterday’s release of Republican Presidential hopeful Mitt Romney’s tax returns (in, let’s be honest, more grudging than perfunctory fashion) and the confirmation of SEAL Team 6’s rescue of two hostage aid workers in Somalia had to be a gift horse that the Obama Administration did not even consider looking into the mouth.  In the case of Romney, the situation clearly spoke to the distinct ideological contrast that while the President wants to provide tax breaks for the middle class, there is this potential Republican Presidential candidate who, in paying roughly 15% in Capital Gains Tax (because he is fortunate in the wealth department) believes that he should be paying less than that.  Where the SEALS are concerned, I wouldn’t go so far as to pat The President on the back for another mission accomplished, because let’s be for real for a sec, facilitating from the safety of a highly secure edifice is nothing like risking life and limb in the trenches; but it sure does look good for his presidential resume to be riding the wave of another military success.

As it were, I am not sure what last night’s address did to change the minds of staunch conservatives, or those who currently find themselves in the middle of the political road.  What I do know however is that from the various conversations that I’ve had over the past 24 hours, lots of Democrats seem pleased that the President is showing his aggressiveness; an almost forlorn trait that has now seemed to reenergize the democratic base.  I would be very interested to see what the Administration plans to do to maintain this momentum.

In the words of Rick Santorum (did I just do that??), Game On!

Obama: Campaigning, Constituencies and Colloquialisms

If ever there were a thankless job, I imagine that between drags on his Newport, Barack Obama would be lamenting to Michelle that the aforementioned was that of the office of President of The United States.  Whether he’s getting kicked in the teeth for trying to ensure that all of the nation’s citizens have a reasonable means by which to acquire medical treatment, blamed for the past, present and future fundamentals of this country’s economy or excluded as having had anything to do with the termination of International Enemy #1, President Obama has seemingly been given three years before everybody and their momma has decided that he’s responsible for the current decline of American Society.  But even as Barry makes preparations for a second term while bumping Mystikal’s “It Ain’t My Fault” throughout every room in The White House, it is important that we all take an assessing look at the direction of this country and identify what this administration has done well and what still needs to be timely and wholly addressed, should The President be afforded four more years.

For many Americans though, there seems to be no middle ground when it comes to our 44th.  It’s either Barry walks on water, or he needs to be publicly tarred and featured at the next Tea Party rally.  Unfortunately, thanks to these two extremes, any thoughtful or critical analysis on the job that President Obama has been doing thus far is more times than not seen as either “hate” or groupie love.  And when members of his most loyal constituency (re: black folks) start making some very vocal criticisms of the President, words like “sell out”, “jealous” or my personal favorite, “Uncle Tom” get strewn out into the Blackosphere.

For instance, people like noted philosopher, activist and Princeton professor Dr. Cornel West (don’t let his Matrix Reloaded and Raheem DeVaughn feature fool you, he’s still an academic) and political commentator/activist Tavis Smiley have been on the business end of Black America’s rebuke for publically calling out President Obama and his policies where they concern war, capitalism and the disproportionate effects of the recession on African-Americans.  Even California Congresswoman Maxine “the-Tea-Party-can-go-to-hell” Waters and other members of the Congressional Black Caucus have been critical of the president and the administration’s jobs record amid a current 16.7% unemployment rate for African-Americans (nearly 47% for younger African-Americans), only to be accused of rabble-rousing and not helping to join the fight in solving what ails America.

Apparently however, Mr. Obama had reached his culpability threshold and found the perfect opportunity to address some of his critics when he attended and spoke at the CBC’s annual Phoenix Awards gala last weekend.  Realizing his inner Reverend Dr. Obama, the president seared some of his detractors with fiery phrases like “stop complaining” and “take off your bedroom slippers.”  The President of course was speaking passionately about his desire to have lawmakers work with him to make legislations like his Jobs Act a reality, but his familiar dressing down of the black lawmakers may not have had the desired effect.

Rep. Allen West, a Republican member of the CBC from Florida, called Obama’s comments “disrespectful and reprehensible,” while Maxine Waters wondered if The President would have spoken so freely with other minority constituencies.

 “I found that language a bit curious because the president spoke to the Hispanic Caucus, and certainly they’re pushing him on immigration… he certainly didn’t tell them to stop complaining. And he would never say that to the gay and lesbian community, who really pushed him on Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.”

Personally, while I cringed a bit at Mr. Obama’s house slippers reference (if I’m being honest, it was deliberate and pretty indelicate), I did appreciate  the fact that he actually acknowledged that some black activists and members of the CBC were critical of his record and took the time to respond to it (if not round-aboutly).  What did annoy me a bit however, was the realization that Mr. Obama has not appeared as comfortable addressing his conservative detractors as bluntly as he did the attendees at the CBC Gala.

I don’t think that as a public servant, Barack Obama is above reproach when people are genuinely feeling as though he isn’t representing their interest, but I also don’t think Barack Obama should simply smile and nod or bend over backwards acquiescently as a means to avoid confrontation with those who don’t agree with his politics.  If he truly wants to enact change, Mr. Obama is going to have to be authoritative; he is going to have to be bold, and his is going to have to be confrontational.  And not just with the black people that Al Sharpton reminds “not to compare him with the Almighty, but with the alternative.”

Buffoon of The Week: Republican’t Jeff Landry

Did anyone see this dunder-head last night? Talk about exercising your first amendment right at the expense of revealing your confounding idiocy to the world (and of course, looking like a Grade A jackass!).

Clearly, Rep. Jeff Landry of Louisiana did not get (or he conveniently deleted) the memo yesterday that called for all Congressional leaders to play nice during President Obama’s job speech before the joint session of Congress. And while he did not rage “Joe Wilson style” last night, Landry was resolve to be (un)civilly disobedient while The POTUS discussed getting Americans back to work.

Now, unlike many of Rep. Landry’s colleagues who couldn’t show even a modicum of respect to the President by being in attendance, only to later blame their absence on the flooding cause by Tropical Depression Lee (here’s looking at you Michele Bachmann and your raggedy and “misguided” after-speech press conference), the Republican Representative from Louisiana was in attendance, but with an agenda of his own.

When President Obama got to the part of his speech acknowledging that Republicans may have ideas that differed from his own $447 billion jobs package, Landry held up a printed sign that read: Drilling = Jobs.

To be fair, Landry’s break from decorum was certainly not as egregious an offense as Rep. Wilson’s two years ago or the scores of other incidents of unapologetic disrespect coming from The Right toward Obama, but offense it still was. When are these politicians going to realize that their do-nothing stances, belligerent personal attacks, baseless claims and cantankerous demeanors are all quite unattractive to the people whom they were elected to represent and serve? Further, with the social and financial woes currently befalling this country and a Congress approval rating at just 12%, don’tcha think these politicians would at least “appear” receptive and interested in meeting Mr. Obama halfway to fix what’s broken in Washington and beyond?

But more than just the rigmarole of playing politics, for me, this is one incident in a long line of petulant, insolent and openly defiant acts of classless behavior toward The President. I won’t even bother addressing the root of said behavior or why some of these conservatives frothingly attack Obama (no, not Obama’s politics…Obama the man) because whether America admits it or not, we all know the words to that hymn. But I would venture to say that with the value of our Dollar only worth 2/3 of The Euro, foreclosures and lay-offs across the nation abounding and our indebtedness to China being something even our children’s children will live to experience, what Rep. Jeff Landry should have been doing last night was listening to determine if he could find common ground with some of The President’s ideas and proposals instead of questing for the most ideal moment to try to upstage the POTUS with that got’darn sign!!!

See folks, that is why it is so important that we do our part and vote, stay versed on the issues and hold our elected officials accountable. Because at the end of the day, if American politicians don’t get real, and do so quickly, we are all going to be in trouble (translation: requesting that our Value Meals be upsized…in Mandarin). Let us pray!

*Leads readers into Altar Call*

Obama’s Jobs Speech: What I Want to Hear

It’s amazing to me that with a national unemployment rate teetering at just over 9% that anyone would be averse to having some immediate discourse about the economy and ways in which all the President’s horses and all the President’s men can get America back on the right track again.

But unfortunately, whether it be the Speaker of the House dissing him in favor of the radically absurd pow-pow disguised as a Republican Presidential Candidates Debate or the 8:30 p.m. kick-off time for the National Football League’s season opener, this week President Obama has pretty much had to get in where he’s been able to fit in to share his ideas on the economy with the American people.

In a little less than ten minutes, Mr. Obama plans to address a joint session of Congress (who ironically, are all are gainfully employed) as well as the citizens of this nation to present his speech on job creation. In it, the POTUS is expected to discuss a package roll out, that if passes the house will cut unemployment by at least a point, boost the GDP and cost half of what the dogged 2009 stimulus plan did.

But like many Americans who are out of work, have depleted their savings and are worried about the long term, my question to Mr. Obama is “how” does he plan to make this all work, and is it too late for him to even try?

Although late in coming, tonight there are a few key points that I am looking for the POTUS to address:

Like, what specifically has lead to the fundamentals of our economy being so feeble, especially in light of the fact that we are “technically” two years out of the recession. And what sectors will see the greatest benefit of this “don’t-call-it-a-stimulus-plan?” Also, what sort of infrastructure jobs can we be looking to see created? Or, what does this plan do to the Federal Deficit? Lastly, when can Americans plan to see this package implemented?

Sure, there are a whole host of other questions I’d love to see answered (how can America afford a several billion dollar job package when we just had to raise our debt ceiling to pay our bills, what’s the likelihood that this plan will have bipartisanship backing, what will happen to the current payroll tax cuts and unemployment benefits in light of this new package…), but I figure if the President at least attempts to address these key inquiries, in my mind, I’ll feel like this national conversation on jobs and the economy is more than just lip service or an attempt to pacify me until 2012.

We’ll see…

Happy eh, Labor Day?

Although for many of us, the first Monday in September is typically observed by having a day off from work, partaking in the last official cookout of the summer and donning the last of the summer-white in our closets, the true celebration of this day was intended to be so much more.  Labor Day was designed back in the late 1800’s as a creation of the labor movement, dedicated to the social and economic achievements of the American workforce.  The annual observance is a tribute to the contributions that workers in this country have made to the strength, prosperity and well-being of The United States.

Still, the irony in celebrating Labor Day amidst American jobs being shipped to places like China and India by big corporations because of the lower cost to them (translation: cheaper labor), large and small businesses alike going out of business and a national unemployment rate of 9.1% (that’s close to 14 million people out of work, folks) is certainly not lost on me.  That is why, with the American economy in such a state of disarray and the bleak jobs report at the end of August, I am wholly optimistic and looking forward to what President Obama plans to outline to the country in the way of his Jobs Speech before a joint session of congress this Thursday. And this is despite the fact that his speech directly conflicts with the 2011 NFL season opener…all thanks to the POTUS being kinda weak (yes, I said it) and conciliatory by agreeing to reschedule his initial speech from Wednesday to Thursday after House Speaker John Boehner rejected his request for Wednesday, September 7; the same day that the Republican presidential debates in California are scheduled to take place…but I digress.

And although the national unemployment rate has gone down slightly since this time last year (9.6% to 9.1%), the American people are still very jaded and fed-up with the political hostilities and posturing from both sides of the aisle and want some tangible solutions to rectify the current state of this union so that next year, Labor Day will be a holiday worth celebrating.

The “Touch of Gray” Gift I Sent to Obama: Just An Investment in My Future

Thanks to the ever-oblivious extremists on the far right, the unrelenting long form birth certificate media coverage and overall ridiculousness of Donald Trump and his Birthers battle cry, Barack Obama may likely go down in history as the one President whose birthday, the entire population of the United States remembers!  But the circumstances surrounding his birth haven’t been the only issue that the POTUS has had to deal with just two-years into his first presidential term.

With “Change” not taking hold quite as quickly as we had all hoped, a national economy on the brink of collapse, wars abroad on two fronts and the most visceral and repugnant opposition known to man in his own back yard, is it any wonder that the once striking obsidian colored head of our beloved 44^th President now looks as though he’s been volunteering to personally wipe clean the chalk boards at Sasha and Malia’s school…sans erasers?

Clearly, on the job stress has played a major factor in Mr. Obama’s rather rapid transformation into Fred G. Sanford.  That is why, before the change takes full effect and he starts using four letter sentence enhancers to address those Tea Party nuts and his GOP adversaries, I intend to send a care package full of Just for Men: Touch of Gray to the White House.  Trust me, while there is nothing wrong with a spicy Silverfox, a Faux News highlight reel of a gray and cantankerous Obama cussing out Boehner, Cantor and Bachmann would certainly not bode well for his 2012 re-election prospects, and my chances at Universal Healthcare Coverage.

Happy 50^th Birthday Mr. President!

2011 Euro-Tour: O’bama Wows on The Emerald Isle

It was a day of photo-ops, t-shirt sales and pint upon pints of libations; yet the scene wasn’t that of an ultimate Euro rave, but instead the result of The Leader of The Free World returning home to his roots, so to speak.

Relishing a superstar ovation, President and First Lady Obama were warmly welcomed and embraced in Ireland while visiting the island nation as part of The POTUS’s six-day, four-country European tour. His itinerary will also include visits to England, France and Poland.

In Dublin today, Obama spoke to a crowd of nearly 25,000 people in what was described as a “campaign styled” speech, to praise the long-standing relationship that Ireland has cultivated with The United States, and stated further that his travel to the country was designed to “reaffirm those bonds of affection.”

And although it is understood that the President’s European excursion will serve as an international platform to express his views and cement his position on the global economy, the uproarious Arab Spring and to (no doubt) strategically execute a bit of intercontinental campaigning in preparation for 2012, to the Irish people, today’s stop-through by the President seemed more about familial comraderie than politics.

Visiting Moneygall (a village just between Dublin and Limerick, determined to be the likely birthplace of the president’s great-great-great grandfather before his migration to America in 1850) The Obamas briefly dropped by a pub to converse with residents and partake of the local brew.

“[Guinness] tastes so much better here than it does in the States. You’re keeping all the best stuff here.”

But amidst the good time, revelry and hearty swigging, Mr. Obama pulled out a wad of cash and left the pub owner and patrons with some humorous, yet politically significant parting words:

“I just want you to know the president pays his bar tab.”

With the POTUS exhibiting such strong feelings about satisfying a tavern debt, one has to wonder if in the months to come and with an election on the horizon, the president will be focusing just as intently and working with effective leaders on ways to repair the global economy and rectify our own national financial woes?