Tag Archives: GOP

Let’s Take a Twirl Around Herman’s Foggy Head

16 Nov

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The only thing that could have made this answer better was if it had happened during one of the many Republican Presidential Debates that have been oh so entertaining over these past few months!

Agreeing to meet with reporters from the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel earlier this week before one of several fundraising excursions in Wisconsin, Herman Cain gave the contingent his nonsensical perspective on what exactly he knew about the economy, collective bargaining and that great political equalizer, Foreign Policy.

Now, while I do understand the need for Cain to be careful in selecting his words and conveying his thoughts (less he end up a Morning or Late Show sound bite…wait…never mind), what Cain was doing in this interview was not carefully considering his verbiage, but instead having an “Oh –ish” moment where he had no clue how to answer the question at all.

But instead of asking for a lifeline or simply admitting to being a mere mortal like the rest of us (well, after about 4 minutes of hemming and hawing, he sort of does), Cain decided that Jedi mind tricks were the way to go.  I mean really, how could Herman go wrong by asking the interviewer to confirm that what he thought he knew was in fact correct before he proceeded to explain why he would do a better job than Obama in Libya without really knowing what Obama’s stance on Libya was in the first place? *takes deep breath*

Seriously though, as painful as the majority of this interview was to watch, I didn’t feel the least bit sorry for Herman Cain.  What I have come to notice with a great many of the GOP candidates for President is that they have a lot of fiery rhetoric to get the base clamoring behind their campaigns, but after peeling away the fervent speeches, singular philosophy and oversold images, there seems very little substance from which to truly gauge these men (and woman).

But hey, between Bachmann’s HPV flub, Perry’s 2 out of 3 Government Agency disbanding and now Cain saying a lot of nothing, I can’t help but anticipate some pretty epic miscues from the rest.

I’m quite sure Barry can’t either.


GOP Debates: Like a WWE Cage Match, But Better

14 Sep


Let me just preface my impending silliness by first saying that regardless of political preference, I believe it is important that everyone, but especially those with a voice (vote) follow all of the presidential debates and candidates. I mean really; how can one make an informed decision about who should lead and represent this nation without first knowing something about the various individuals who’d like to hold that coveted position from the Oval Office at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave?

Okay…my Public Service Announcement now out of the way, please turn your attentions to this clip from Monday Night’s Republican presidential debate.  Although I gave many of the candidates high marks in the Business Wear and Presidential Tie competitions, it was the WWE tag-team emulation by Michele Bachmann and Rick Satorum on Rick Perry that got my full attention.  Slamming Perry on his controversial mandate of the required HPV/Gardasil vaccination for young girls, Machine Gun Michele and Ricochet Rick took turns coming off the top rope on Pretty Boy Perry.

But it was Bachmann’s fleeting flash of brilliance in the form of a retort to Governor Perry’s feigned offense at Bachmann’s notion that he was all about pharmaceutical money, not saving lives when it came to the vaccines, that made my day and quite frankly, made Perry look less like a courageous but vanquished Luchador and more like the wobbly kneed, defeated opponent at the end of a game of Mortal Kombat. Finish Him!!!!!

*And on a totally unrelated note, Mitt Romney’s various constipated expressions and Ron Paul’s interest in whatever was on the floor next to his podium were equally as entertaining as Monday Night’s Main Event grudge match*

**Oh, oh…and per Governor Perry, Texas is “day in and day out, a place that protects life.”…You know, unless of course you have a scheduled execution date with the Texas Department of Criminal Justice.  Just saying**

The “Touch of Gray” Gift I Sent to Obama: Just An Investment in My Future

4 Aug

Thanks to the ever-oblivious extremists on the far right, the unrelenting long form birth certificate media coverage and overall ridiculousness of Donald Trump and his Birthers battle cry, Barack Obama may likely go down in history as the one President whose birthday, the entire population of the United States remembers!  But the circumstances surrounding his birth haven’t been the only issue that the POTUS has had to deal with just two-years into his first presidential term.

With “Change” not taking hold quite as quickly as we had all hoped, a national economy on the brink of collapse, wars abroad on two fronts and the most visceral and repugnant opposition known to man in his own back yard, is it any wonder that the once striking obsidian colored head of our beloved 44th President now looks as though he’s been volunteering to personally wipe clean the chalk boards at Sasha and Malia’s school…sans erasers?

Clearly, on the job stress has played a major factor in Mr. Obama’s rather rapid transformation into Fred G. Sanford.  That is why, before the change takes full effect and he starts using four letter sentence enhancers to address those Tea Party nuts and his GOP adversaries, I intend to send a care package full of Just for Men: Touch of Gray to the White House.  Trust me, while there is nothing wrong with a spicy Silverfox, a Faux News highlight reel of a gray and cantankerous Obama cussing out Boehner, Cantor and Bachmann would certainly not bode well for his 2012 re-election prospects, and my chances at Universal Healthcare Coverage.

Happy 50th Birthday Mr. President!

Representatives Gone Wild: Social Media & the New York Congressmen Who Should Avoid Them

31 May

Obviously, I’m nothing more than a depraved mind, cloaked beneath the façade of the cultured and well-rounded Christian woman I pretend to be on the daily, because this Anthony Weiner story had me tickled pink (snickers) for most of the weekend and again, much of today. As reported by People.com:

A New York congressman says a lewd photo sent to a college student from his Twitter account was posted by a hacker – and he’s hired a lawyer to investigate, his office said Tuesday.

The kerfuffle, which some tabloid press is calling “Weinergate,” kicked off Friday when a photo of a man’s bulging crotch in boxer briefs appeared in Rep. Anthony Weiner’s Twitter stream.

The Tweet was addressed to college student Gennette Cordova, 21, of Seattle – but the image was visible to all of Weiner’s 40,000 followers.

The post was swiftly deleted, and the New York Democrat soon Tweeted that his account had been hacked. “More Weiner Jokes for all my guests,” he Tweeted.

Cordova denied that she had ever met Weiner, much less had a relationship with him as some bloggers intimated. (The photo was first reported by conservative commentator Andrew Breitbart’s biggovernment.com.)

“I have never met Congressman Weiner, though I am a fan,” she told the New York Daily News over the weekend. “I’ve never been to New York or to D.C.”

Cordova also addressed the fact she once Tweeted, “I wonder what my boyfriend @RepWeiner is up to,” explaining that it was a joke.

“I have seen myself labeled as the ‘Femme Fatale of Weinergate,’ ‘Anthony Weiner’s 21-year-old coed mistress’ and ‘the self-proclaimed girlfriend of Anthony Weiner,'” she told the Daily News in the statement. “All of this is so outlandish that I don’t know whether to be pissed off or amused.”

Frankly (giggles), I’m pretty sure this is a total non-story, and likely some perv’s idea of a humorous prank to play on a United States Congressman with an equally humorous last name; OR…it could very well be the GOP’s riposte to the Christopher Lee (also a Congressman from New York) Craigslist conundrum…Hmm.

At any rate, although through no fault of his own, I’d hope that with a last name like Weiner, Anthony will do everything in his power going forward to keep his privates (or reprobate privates disguised as his) out of the press!

I’m also going to need his twitter handlers to be more vigilant!  Sheesh.

Not Much Packin’ Going On Today

25 Jan

So…I did have a blog post planned for tonight, but about a quarter of the way through President Obama’s State of The Union Address, I became irreparably distracted by John Boehner’s impervious screw face.

Now I am left wondering if Mr. Speaker attended tonight’s speech in a state of severe constipation, or if he picked up where Joe Wilson’s State of The Union Obama-Hateration left off last year?

Anyway, I promise I will do better tomorrow kids!


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