Tag Archives: Christina Aguilera

Leave Christina Alone: I’m Not One for Ramparts Either

7 Feb

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It’s a song we all learned in primary school, one we’ve sung, hummed or mouthed every fall Friday night in high school, one that gives us chills whenever it is blared at the Olympic Games and yes, one we should all know by heart.

Now don’t get me wrong, while half the drunkards in the Jonesy-Dome didn’t even notice the minor gaffe, it was still pretty embarrassing (and a little confusing…I had to mute the TV and sing the song over in my mind, just to ensure *I* hadn’t been singing it wrong all these years) that one of our more admired and decorated pop stars (as opposed to one of our shunned crack pots) took to the sporting world’s biggest stage and nip-tucked The National Anthem like a nervous talent show contestant.  But from the outcry and sheer discontentment in some cases, it would almost seem that many of you were expecting the perfection of a sweated-out, track suit, pre-crack Whitney rendered Star-Spangled Banner to have been sung at Sunday night’s Super Bowl festivities.  And for as much of a “blue-eyed soul” songstress as Aguilera truly is, it simply is not fair to her or to any singer that has come before or will come after her, to compare their “anthem” performances to the one that still gives Whitney Houston a pass in our hearts; even after all these years of drugs, shambolic weaves and other buffoonery while in the company of Bobby Brown.

Still, I get it.  Grammy-Award winning singer or not, an artist honored with the coveted responsibility of commencing Super Bowl  XLV with The National Anthem, should at the very least remember all of its words…especially when said artist has had so much practice “sangin” it (*cough* twice at last year’s NBA Finals *cough*), right?

Well, it’s a good thing for Christina that like Burlesque, this too shall pass.

 

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Another Post About Christina Aguilera. Why Not!? The NBA Did It.

17 Jun

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No, you aren’t experiencing an Aretha Franklin-esque case of déjà-vu (although I imagine suffering from such an affliction would be grounds for the use of a cervical collar…I too experienced severe whiplash upon seeing the Queen of Soul “on repeat”, but I digress), nor am I recycling a post just for giggles.

 Seems like “The Platinum One” (hair, album sales; either works) evoked enough of the Holy Ghost Tuesday night during her rendition of the National Anthem for Game 6 of the NBA Finals, that she was invited back to have church yet again.  It’s funny because, while I genuinely like Christina Aguilera as an artist and think that she has one of the most pure and powerful voices in popular music today, I found her overall performance on Tuesday night to be very animated (c’mon, throwing up the diva-waving-soul-hand barely a minute into the song…there’s not that much “rockets red glare” in the world!) and her adlibs were quite caricatured as well.   But hey, I’m no Simon Cowell, so what do I know? 

Nevertheless, considering that words can’t bring this singing siren down, I suppose her invitation for a do-over tonight further justifies in her mind that she is the hottest pop-tart in the toaster this week… which, if you ask me, is quite a shame.  Not knocking Christina, but I really wish that the governing and decision making bodies within the NBA had decided to angle this repeat performance as an opportunity for redemption; in which case we’d be hearing from a totatllly different songstress tonight (withering side-eye at Anita Baker).

~Game 7: Celtics for all the Marbles!~

Game 6 Distractions

15 Jun

*Sigh*

 I began my day with such HIGH hopes for the Boston Celtics in Game 6.  Sure, I know that the game is far from over and that there is still quite a bit of basketball yet to play, but as it stands right now, the Lakers are leading the Celtics at the half by 20, and the mere idea of a Game 7 is making my head hurt.

 But as much as I’m pulling for the Celtics and hoping they can stave-off a financially and commercially manufactured Game 7, this Lakers lead has me totally unable to focus on the game anymore.  Luckily for me, there are plenty of distractions in the Staple Center tonight to capture my attention:

  1. Magic Johnson.  I get it that he is a legend and very knowledgeable about basketball.  But seriously, why is this man an analyst?  He is not very objective when it comes to a discussion about any team and his beloved Lakers.  We know that you are a Hall of Fame Laker and we know that you have a vested interest in Laker affairs.  Why not just spare us all the unveiled Laker love and go host a midnight showing of the Karate Kid at one of your theaters.
  2. During the national anthem (where she apparently caught the Holy Ghost), I was totally thrown for a loop by Christina Aguilera’s platinum lace front.  Thankfully, Rick Rubin’s beastly facial hair and natty shag provided an earthier alternative to the diva’s uber glam and overdone tresses.
  3. As much as I enjoy Jeff Van Gundy’s imbalanced banter, looking at him on television makes me realize that the poor baby needs a power nap in the worst way.
  4. Between his performance in Game 5 and tonight, I am beginning to think that Jesus Shuttlesworth is out there point shaving.
  5. What in the world is that on Andy Garcia’s face?  Clearly his mustache is out of control and needs to be neutered.

 *Looks up from laptop*

 Yep, The Lakers are still up by 20+.  Sadly, this means that I must give up the ghost friends.  Here’s hoping that Celtics bring their A-game on Thursday.

 Ugh.

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