Thursday Night Decompressing: Pedicures and Randomness

7 Apr

It seems like every couple of weeks, I am posting about what a frenetic workday I’ve had, or how desperately I need a timeout or a mental health day.  With today being no exception, by 3 o’clock, I had already decided that a mini spa night was in my future as soon as I got home. But while I sit here soaking my toesies in a jetted, bubbly basin, all I seem able to think about are some of the seriously arbitrary reflections that have made up my week thus far.

And yes (you guessed it), instead of paying some glorified people whisperer to help me purge, I’ll simply do so here:

  1. When I’m already doing 75 mph in a 65 mph zone, why in theee heck would the dude behind me blow past, only to get in front of me then throttle down to 60?
  2. Can Kevin Hart technically be classified as a dwarf?
  3. Hey Black Man in the interracial relationship; stop looking warily at me as you and your wife walk by.  I’m concerned with my own United Colors of Benetton Family to be worried about yours!
  4. Poptarts are the devil.
  5. Whose idea was it to A) create the Ford Thunderbird? B) design its interior with burnt sienna dashboards, ceilings, seats and carpeting?
  6. Papa San is an utter fool for penning “Maddy Maddy Cry” and staying in character for the entire 3:23 of the song.
  7. “I know you are getting ready to leave…” naw chief. I’ve been in the office since 8am.  Anything you didn’t think to address or get out of me before 6pm will have to wait until tomorrow.
  8. Didn’t we determine after “Forever” that even under multiple aliases, Sean Combs not be allowed to release any music where he is doing any of the rapping or singing?
  9. How is it that my cellphone is roaming when I am sitting in my own house?
  10. Where has Amel Larrieux been?
  11. I’m pretty sure that nowhere in the job description for Leader of The Free World does “ask for permission” appear.

 

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